The Swearing Nun

A nun schedules a meeting with her Mother Superior. After a few minutes of tense hand-wringing, the nun says, "Mother, I have sinned. I have wrongly used vulgar language."

The Mother Superior calmly replies, "Tell me sister, when did this happen?"

"I was shooting a game of golf. On the 10th hole I hit a terrible drive, which hooked and rolled in a ditch."

"Is that when you cursed, young one?"

"No - then, a gopher scrambled to the bottom of the ditch, grabbed my ball in its teeth and scampered back into the rough!"

"Ah, and that must have been when you cursed, dear one."

"No - while the gopher ran across the rough, an eagle swooped down and grabbed the gopher, soaring into the sky!"

"Surely, THAT was when you cursed, sister!"

"No - the eagle squeezed the gopher, the ball popped out of the gopher's mouth, landed on the green and amazingly rolled to within two feet of the pin on the 10th hole."

The Mother Superior pauses, then says, "Don't tell me - you missed the !@#$%^&* putt!"